Thanksgiving is Coming

For the first day in a few the sun is out, and it is a beautiful Fall day. So in anticipation of cooking next week for Thanksgiving, I am making a big ole batch of Snickerdoodle cookies. Been a while since I've made them, but my insulin resistance is in check and it just feels like a cookie day. :)

I made the orange cranberry sauce yesterday to give it several days to really cure up. A great recipe I've had for years (since Alaska), I figured it was better than the canned stuff this year. I will also be making my friend Denice's pumpkin cake. I do not like pumpkin generally, but this cake is the bomb. I still have to work up an appetiser, and my Thanksgiving cooking will be complete.

Hope this finds everyone happy and ready for the big feed. Remember to be thankful for the cook, as well as everything else in life. Happy Thanksgiving!

On little Dogs and Dreams

Growing up I was never much for pets. I was not the type of child who coveted stuffed animals or played with them past three years of age. I was far too interested in reading and my visual pursuits to bother with the entire animal kingdom. They were animals after all, and not very conversational. As I grew up I would look upon pet crazy neighbors and friends (with the rare exception of Judy's dog Max perhaps) and not know what to think of their devotion. I certainly did not share it. Then came Doodle.

When Doodle came home with me he was six weeks old and just weaned from his mother. I had seen him at every stage of development, and here he was, this tiny squirmy thing. Those first weeks were difficult, as he was plucked from his swarm of squirmy noisy brothers and sisters and plopped into my quiet life. The very first night he cried and cried. I did all I knew how to do to comfort this furry little thing. I cuddled him like a baby, sang little Doodle songs and rubbed his little head until he mercifully fell asleep. It wasn't long (three days actually...Ris won the bet) until I broke my first rule of dog ownership and allowed him to sleep at my feet on my bed. It seemed to calm him down, and before I would turn out the lights I would rub his head until he fell asleep. And so started the ritual. He has not gone without his head rub one day in this house. He immediately falls asleep every time, even if I just rub his head while he lays on my lap. For the longest time I thought I continued to do this to comfort him, but recently realized it actually comforts me as much or maybe even more. I now fall asleep rubbing Doodle's head, a little lesson in comfort and devotion I learned from my dog.

I have witnessed how his body relaxes. I know when I hit that sweet spot rubbing his belly or scratching his back because he flicks his tongue a certain way. I have also been witness to Doodle in a dream state. He twitches, his feet move, and his eyes move and flutter under his lids. He sometimes growls or makes noises, and sometimes even wags his tail. What can he be seeing and reacting to in his dream? I figure he dreams in images since he does not have words to describe visual sensation, but most of dreaming is images for me as a human too. One day while watching this is dawned on me that although he is classified as an animal, very little separates us really as spirits inhabiting form. He breathes, he eats, he dreams, etc. So now I at last understand why animals are important to humans. Not to be dominated or abused for what they lack, but to be companions in this world. To be respected for what unites us on a spiritual level. I get it.

So this is what I have learned from Doodle. It has forced me to start to reexamine my relationship with animals from an entirely different perspective. All of this started by a little squirmy thing that came into my house 17 months ago. I sure have been blessed and I am grateful for my little companion. "So handsome, so smart, such a good dog." :)

News From the Poker Table

I woke up today and decided I simply must do something I have never done, just to shake things up in life. I had read in the local paper about a "Turkey Shoot" at the local VFW Hall, but I have never attended one...so it won the day. I had no idea what to expect, but found playing poker for food an interesting thought. So armed with ten dollars I played five card poker hands for about an hour, and pictured are all my ill gotten gains. Three big farm raised chickens (fresh) and three fresh from the local processer pork sausage bundles. No turkey or ham, but still a chunk o' food for the freezer. Seems my luck dramatically changes when I am playing poker for food. Imagine that.

Why I love that Red-Haired Woman

I watched her very closely. I saw all those weird dog costumes she looked at at Petsmart. God help me, there were fairies, pumpkins, clown costumes, even a "gulp" doggie taco. She would look at them and then look at me...I knew she was visualizing every goofy frill on me. But this is how much she loves me..(or how bad she felt last year for dressing me as a hot dog). I got a new sweater for Halloween. No pirate hat, or devil horns for me. A nice dignified dog sweater. Yeah, the turtleneck is a little over the top, but considering how she could have dressed me I won't complain. Especially with a mouth full of Halloween yogurt doggie treat. WOOF!

Portrait of a Teenager

Crystal as "Mutant Bunny" with attitude.

It's official..she has crossed over to the dark side of teenaged angst.
Oh, goodie.

My Favorite Halloween Costumes 2009

After reviewing all 200 or so costumes that made their way to the door this Halloween these were absolutely my favorites for 2009...The Scary Breakfast Crew....Oooooo

First there was "Evil Prairie Farms Milk"...waaay past it's due date it was definitely 100% Evil as advertised. Then there was "Cereal O' Death"...almost completely sugar and totally deathly. Rounding out this crew was "Processed Orange Juice Drink"...that claimed it never even met an orange. Now who says American ingenuity is on the decline? (LOL)

Happy Halloweenie :)

Fueled by Cake

Ok, It's my birthday, I'll blog. Been a strange summer..but here I am at the end with the cool kiss of Fall on my skin. Always my favorite of seasons, this year more than ever. Haven't blogged because I've been ill, and really had nothing to say in the interim. Working hard, just this week off to a ten day event. Sales are weak and the economy is really abysmal in the Midwest. So disgusted with the health care debates, all political sides, and the status of greed as a lifestyle choice in this country. Don't get me started.

The good news is that after several years of waiting I had a true "ah-hah" moment around an "old" new project. The last week or so actually working on pricing and preparing the artwork. So I have found a lot of energy just doing what I do, and that is good. Doodle is a prize, whatever did I do without my furry faced friend? He'll probably feel the need to update soon...as he sees me typing and remembers he hasn't blogged either. (LOL)

So that is all the news I can think of. Hope this finds everyone happy and healthy out there in blogland. :)

It's My Birthday Card from Rogie :)

Thank you! :)

Chinese Farmer Grows Baby-Shaped Fruit

Yum..I want a Baby Shaped Pear!

Wedding Entrance Dance

Yes, this video has been everywhere you look. But such an expression of joy is an inspiration, and I am happy they shared it with the world. Every single person at this wedding delighted and smiling, a real treat to watch. I wish this couple all my best for a long and happy life. They are well on their way :)

State of Dreams

I found myself dreaming last night of furiously packing supplies for the resistance fighters in Iran. Big boxes of food and clothing, all this media coverage must be getting to me. I was even on the hunt for cell phone batteries and rechargers. I never thought I would see such a revolution in an Islamic country over a democratic election, and I can't imagine how it will end at this point. So here we all sit on our duffs "hoping" we will get health care, and it's not looking too promising. Such a topsy turvy world we live in. I would never have thought Americans would be so docile in the face of real crisis. Nary a peep when Bush stole his first election. I am ashamed, really.

Saw a program last night on a new form of Health care, the "Concierge Doctor". You pay an enormous yearly retainer for 24/7 health care catering to your every whim. The doctor who practices this was a terrible example of how this worked, as she couldn't really describe it to another doctor without sounding snarky and elitist. "If you can afford to pay for the best in individualized health care then you will seek out my services." This is what we have come to in America? A retainer to insure basic health care? It is time to take to the streets.

HBO's Bill Maher Takes On President Obama

This message from Bill Maher is from the birdcage Mr. President. Do what you promised you would do for us, or all the happy media in the world will not save your popularity. You were given a mandate, use it. If we can not trust you to do so, what option is really left to us but revolution?

Another Interesting Ebay Adventure

In the world of Ebay reseller it is always something. This week it was truly something, as my sister found a box of old junk jewelry at an auction. Same as she does almost weekly, where I take the contents, categorize them, and prepare pieces for sale. Who knew my interest in costume jewelry would ever be called upon in this way, just goes to show education is a great thing. But this weeks jewelry, even though it looked rather mundane at first glance ended up being a true treasure trove. These two small odd looking pieces are actually Victorian Mourning Jewelry fashioned out of woven hair. Yes it seems morbid, but the Edwardians had a completely different view of death than we do, since most often it was right in their parlour. They didn't have photographs to remember the deceased as we do, so this craft was born. This set is exceedingly rare, as it is formed into heart shapes, and the earrings are very long for the period. The entire box of jewelry pieces cost Patty $40.00, and she didn't even know these were in there, and wouldn't have recognized their value in any case since they are the first we've ever found. I knew immediately what they were, and was surprised at their pristine condition. Amazing what you can find in Illinois still. As of this minute this set is bringing $480.00 on Ebay, and the auctions will finish this evening. Pretty good return for a dollar.

This wasn't even the reason she was bidding on this box. She was actually bidding on it for the glass bead necklaces that I used for my bracelets. There were several for me, and a big group of plastic necklaces as well. I pulled what I wanted, and ended up with 35 jewelry lots to sell on Ebay later. But the big surprise was when I returned home, and started cutting up the necklaces for the beads, I discovered those two big chunky amber colored necklaces were actually real amber and not plastic. It it sometimes hard to tell because amber is so light. So somebody is really going to love this beautiful real amber chunky bracelet currently in production on my desk. It was a good auction week :)

UPDATE: The Mourning Jewelry sold for $619.00 WooHoo!

Mona Lisa

Ah-Chooooooo

Gad, another head cold. I always get them whenever the season turns, but this one has been particularly nasty. Add a little step throat, and as you can imagine I've been laying around in and out of consciousness and begging for death over the last few days. My poor little dog can't imagine what is wrong with me, he just sits at my side looking really puzzled. But today I am about 60% power, so I am updating my blog and hoping for better health soon.

I missed my niece's actual graduation this weekend, I was much to sick to take my fever and constant phelm into a group of innocent bystanders. Especially with swine flew jitters, I could have cleared the room for sure (LOL) Would have been good for seating I guess. There is always an upside.

Been working on a long serious post about my recent "ah-ha" moment about animals, but it will have to wait until I can type with fewer coughing fits. Happy Birthday Mr. Cook...I hope it was a good one. Will call soon.

Otherwise, I am still alive. This is the good news :)

Oh, Wisest of Little Dogs...

Whatever did I do before I had you to protect me from the

evil windshield wipers? (LOL)

Yes, that is my dog. Snarling and barking at ...umm..windshield wipers. Rather Don Quixote of him in a doggie sort of way, no? But the best part is when I turn them off, he is so pleased with himself for banishing the "evil-doers". He still can't figure out why he can't bite them through the glass. Sigh...Doodle, Doodle, Doodle. :::shaking my head:::

Craig Ferguson 5/18/9A Late Late Show OOPS beginning

I've said it before, and I'll say it again...I would go straight for this guy! (LOL)

The Birthday Boy Speaks

Some days it really pays to get up from my cushy bed. I mean yesterday the red headed woman I live with went crazy. She did, all day yammering on about something called "birthday". All I know is that I am feeling some serious food damage today, and will dictate this missive from the couch, thank you.

As I was saying, who knew there were so many dog treats allowed in one day? I knew something was up when early on I got this big fluffy thing that looks like a pillow. I assumed it was a bigger, fluffier chew toy and started ripping at the seams right away, but "she-who-will-be-obeyed-if-I-feel-like-it" started the whole "No, No, NO!" routine. She can be such a killjoy like that.

Next I got something I won't soon forget. It was a "doggie cake". At least that was what she called it. All I know is that this "cake" thing was actually chicken liver iced with peanut butter. She sent one over to Oscar for his birthday too, I can hardly wait to compare notes with him on how long it took for him to eat his. I clocked mine at 2 minutes 37 seconds with nary a crumb left. All the time asking, as always, what's for dessert? Buurp.

But the best, and I mean the best, was the new toy she actually let me chew on. I generally like new toys, it is a challenge to see how long it takes to chew them up; I mean I use squeak toys to pick my teeth. But the new toy was something marvelous. Fits well in my mouth. Nice and red, that's a plus. But this mild mannered toy has a secret...it is filled with FOOD! And when it's empty, I can drop it at her feet and it magically fills up with more food. I ask you...can it get any better than this? I don't think so!

So this whole "birthday" thing wasn't half bad. I vote every day be a "birthday" day. Oops, new toy is empty. Gotta go see if that whole "magical appearing food" works today.

XOXOXOX
The DOODster

It MUST Be Middle Age...

...that makes products "as seen on TV" actually desirable? I have such a sceptical eye for marketing, always reading the real story behind the hype. But I recently succumbed and purchased my very own Topsy Turvy Tomato Planter. (This from a woman that had steadfastly refused to wear clothing with logos and boycotted designer signatures for years.) But it was all so thrilling...growing actual tomatoes myself? No crawling around in the dirt? No cages, no aphids and other critters chomping delicate stems? Upside down, hanging outside like a flowering houseplant? Sign me up !!! (LOL) So I did my part for the retail economy recovery, I purchased two Topsy Turvy planter systems and they hang from my balcony as we speak. One for tomatoes, one for cucumbers. I enlisted the help of a few of my neighbors, all expecting juicy tomatoes and cucumbers all summer. So do your work Topsy Turvey Planters! Deliver on the hype..I'll be watching you.

Doodle's Ode to Spring

Throwtheball, throwtheball, throwtheball already!

What was that? Can I EAT it?


This grass in entirely too tall. Mow it, or get your own damn ball!

And so it can now be said...

Over 15 million hits on Youtube over the last week, Susan Boyle has become a sensation. I attached her video to my blog a couple of days ago because I was very impressed by her, and then thought about why this particular moment in time was so inspiring to me.

It is not the lesson of don't judge a book by it's cover, although I would bet this was the lesson for some of those millions. For me it was her amazingly clear spirit and humility. From the very first, when she walked out on this stage, her gait clearly shows a woman unaccustomed to wearing high heels. Finding the mark, and looking over an audience fully prepared to rip her spirit to shreds, she continued to stand her ground and smiled. When she answered her age, it was obvious she was prepared for the negative reaction, and tried her best to laugh first with attitude. And that small smile just before the first note. as if she knew she could sing, and would come Hell or High Water. And so she did.

During her performance, she backed off her mark slowly, almost as if she was retreating from all the eyes focused on her. I doubt she heard anything but her own voice, and the promise she made herself in her head."Just do it." She had won just being there. That is why she started to walk off before the judging I think, because she was just that thrilled to have participated. I doubt she heard most of what the judges said, and her childlike reaction when she realized she would be coming back to sing again was a genuine delight. She was used to hearing no, a yes more than she could hope for. Stomping and whooping when she heard three yes votes, that was her spirit let free.

Success comes at the perfect time for you Susan. When you can best enjoy it and appreciate it with maturity. I wish you best in this competition, but regardless of the outcome you have won already. My wish for you is that you work as hard as you can to preserve yourself, the core of you that inspired us all. Keep your cat and your home, resist anything that doesn't feel right for you. Just keep singing for us all!

Outstanding!

A very deep puddle. :) Susan Boyle sings "I Dreamed a Dream" and shows Britain and the World what talent looks like. You GO girl!

Click on blank space to view Youtube video

Bunnies and Vacuum Cleaners

Today I did something I have never attempted. My vacuum cleaner was on the fritz, blowing out dust instead of sucking it up. Now this machine is nearly new, and on a whim and armed with a Phillip's screwdriver I decided that I was going to open it and see what the problem was. I took this machine completely apart, cleaned and cleared out the dust bunnies and clogs, and it lives again! It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. and now it works like a charm. I have never been mechanically inclined, so this is a real accomplishment for me. I didn't even break a nail.

Rainy day here, and I am busy doing some Spring cleaning. I'm also making a big coconut cake for Easter in honor of my grandmother. She always made coconut cake at Easter, I was an adult before I realized other families made carrot cake. Making it from scratch, with two cans of flaked coconut just like she would. I'll try to take a picture of it before it is crumbs. (LOL)

Happy Easter to all. A nice time to appreciate growth and regeneration, and of course coconut cake. :)

The Force of Nature called by the name Doodle

String Chew Toy before Doodle

String Chew Toy after Doodle and three hours

Ecco Walking Shoe before Doodle

Ecco Walking Shoe after Doodle and three months

This little McDonald's kids Happy Meal toy is built like a tank. Doodle has been chewing this a while and it is still intact, a major engineering achievement to be sure. Last night, after winding it up (when wound it wiggles like it is alive) and throwing it for him the billionth time, I actually watched my dog WIND the toy himself and bring it back to me wriggling. Let me repeat this...he used his teeth to grasp the winder and turned it until it started moving and brought it back to me. He is so proud of this accomplishment he has spent the morning winding and rewinding it.

I figure a videotape of this on Youtube will get a zillion hits. What on earth kind of alien chew monster am I living with? (LOL)

The Show Must Go On

Finally shaking off some long time emotional shackles and moving forward. The last few months have been rough, I am here to tell you that the economic crisis is not just a concept to me. Otherwise I am healthy, happy with my little dog friend and moving forward in new directions. Watching the current meltdown of the economy and the bursting of a huge societal bubble has been interesting. Especially watching people that have been the most self absorbed and selfish in the "Me" decade scramble around like cockroaches to get out of the line of fire. Is it me, or does the mob assembling somewhat resemble the French Revolution in some cases? (LOL) Well, lets hope the C.E.O.s of several major corporations don't make any cake-like utterances. Pitchfork at the ready here. I will end with a great quote from the Jewish Buddha.

"Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out...

Forget this and attaining Enlightenment will be the least of your problems."

Still Flying High :)

What a great day we all had yesterday. I awoke this morning and immediately started thinking of what I would commit to in order to help our new president be successful in his vision of rebuilding America. That is looking like public service to me at this juncture, and I do feel excited about participating again. Will update when I find my little niche.

Found this goofy little gem on Ebay, and it made me laugh out loud. Humor is back! And not the "I'm so embarrassed of him I am laughing uncomfortably" kind. As a devoted humorist I must admit the last eight years have been bleak indeed.

I can Hardly WAIT....

...to plop my new rubber chicken purse on a table at Denny's , pull out a couple of eggs, and ask the waitress to have them cooked "over easy." (LOL) This fa-a-a-bulous purse was a Christmas gift from Rogie, of course! :)

And you know I totally love it!

Bwwwwaaaak!

I would have guessed RED...

You Are an Orange Crayon

Your world is colored with offbeat, confident, and stimulating colors. You have a personality that's downright weird - and you wouldn't change it for anything. Loud and expressive, you voice your opinions fearlessly and strongly. And while you have a strong personality, you can be friends with almost anyone. Your color wheel opposite is blue. Your confidence is something blue people truly envy.

What Color Crayon Are You?

Cedarfame: The Interview Questions

These are the interview questions Cedarflame graciously sent me. Very hard to answer in some cases but very cool. Enjoy!

1. You are one of the few Artists that I have meant that have actually had successful careers doing the thing they love best, art. How did that come about for you?

Like everything in life, small steps covered large distances. I made a series of Wall Icons for a gallery in Fremont, Seattle entitled "Everyday Icons" making everyday people and issues into updated Saints. They proved popular locally, and a jewelry line was formed from this idea, small wearable alters. With popularity comes imitation I when I found I was being mimicked by another jewelry company in the region I scheduled shows all over the country, picking up about 200 or so wholesale accounts. All the while thinking of the natural progression of this idea. It occurred to me that Catholic votive candles were the next step, and I took a whole summer in 1993 painting and developing this idea. I introduced them in September of that year, never dreaming they would take off as they did. My business grew 10 times it's size every month for almost two years, until I found myself with 5000+ wholesale accounts and international accounts as far away as Italy and Australia. I actually only knew it would be a success when I sold my favorite store on the planet TWIST in Portland, Ore. a group of candles and they reordered five times the initial order within three weeks early on. It has been my experience that creative ideas overlap each other, and build larger as they are explored fully.

2. Do you think that education is just as important to someone pursuing a career as an artist or do you think talent is all one needs to succeed?

To all the teachers out there I apologize in advance. I had a sterling formal education, but I do believe sometimes this kills art. I was always a rebel in school, who succeeded in spite of many well meaning teachers. A couple stand out, those who actually taught and didn't follow some personal dogma. With that said, I would also add education is paramount in artistic success, whether it be self motivated or channeled through formal education. Good ideas do not develop in life if they have no means of final expression. Education teaches those means.

3. As an artist, as well as a person, you have had a few reincarnations in this life (by that I mean moving from one place to another, creating businesses, etc.) do you see yourself in the process of another reincarnation?

I am currently in the seed space of reincarnation, but it has been a long fallow period. To make more success, it takes being really present in life, knowing the reality of the starting point. I've found myself thrashing about for a while, getting my bearings emotionally. I was concerned last year I'd completely lost my ambition, but I feel it starting to return. So I do think my reincarnation is just about to launch again. And I have many strong ideas on the desk. The issue for this Libra is to pick one. (LOL)

4. You have been a Seattelite in the past, what is it about Seattle that seems to draw people who are a little, let’s say, eccentric?

(LOL) If you think Seattle is eccentric move on up to Alaska. Those folks make Seattle folks look like your mother's comfy couch with doilies. That is where I was when my unbelievably talented friend Howard died of Aids, and I made the momentous decision to follow the path we both should have taken. I worked in Seattle sometimes, and looked around in my travels and saw a very vibrant and reasonably priced Mecca, hence my ultimate desire to move there. To answer your question, like brings like. Seattle was the epicenter of cool for about 10 years, building on the eccentricities of the artists, musicians, and innovators that flocked there. I see Seattle now as a victim of it's own success in many ways, and wonder where the hot bed of cool is now. Seattle seems to be populated by all new eccentrics looking for employment, and not in the innovative way.

5. Where ever you are there is an Altar in your home. Tell us how you started creating Altars and what purpose do they have in your life?

Oh My God Risley. This could be a book this question! I do not have a clue why I do this. I covered walls as a preteen with images and stuff, and I can't remember not having a visual space that represented my life spiritually. At this stage of my life my actual altar is smaller, although I tend to make every display (books, fridge magnets, etc) into tiny altar like spaces. But isn't that kinda what home is, an altar to the living? My actual altar is a visual reminder of certain spiritual aspects to remember daily, every item a memory or representation of something for me to remember as I go about my life. Some people make neat little scrapbooks, I make an altar. I have discussed my altar on this blog at length, and sometimes I really think I had a past life in some church capacity. I will say I am fascinated by devotional items, things that are meaningful not for monetary value but for the faith they represent. There is a lot of energy present in items that held the focus of devotion. I find in life I am far more attracted to the substance of things than the top layer of their categorization, The Deceptive Depth of Puddles. :)

Thanks for the questions Risley. You'll be happy to know I did study the Bush Doctrine and made a list of reading materials just in case!

Dog in the HOODIE*

Christmas Morning Doodle

His new Doodle da Vinci Hoodie Sweatshirt

(His Mom does indeed dress him funny)

This Christmas thing is exhausting!

Hanging out with Oscar and Crystal after the carnage.

* Thanks to Risley for the best picture caption :)

Maybe it WAS a Dream

That's what they did in the old Dallas TV Show when things got murky with the plot. But my absence has had a lot more to do with state of mind and computer hard drive crash then anything else, so it might not work. I am at the public library today with the express purpose of updating my blog, I will do my best.

Soon after getting the news I definitely needed surgery for my left eye I went into a depression. Been years since I've dealt with one of those deep dark holes in the fabric of life, and it was just as bad as I remembered it to be. You see, I am one of those millions of marginalized people in this great country with no health insurance, and any health crisis is just that, a real crisis. And as a visual artist (emphasis on visual) anything concerning my eyes is a scary prospect. I did manage to get the surgery, smack dab in the middle of Christmas, so many of my usual holiday traditions went straight out of the window. no Christmas cards or letters, the majority of my traditional cookies made by my family as I recuperated. The spirit wasn't cooperating, and the flesh was weak. Mia Culpa to everyone, I'll try again next year. :(

This week the bandages were finally removed, and I have a sparkling new eye. Well, new to me anyway, the same vision problems (I have always required major correction in the form of glasses) but my left eye is clear of that bloody clotting thing and as good as new. The residual medical billing is staggering however, an it leads me to have increased compassion for people that face everyday medical issues and the absence of money to fix them. I am sure I am not the only one.

Enter stage left my computer, who thought maybe this was a good time to act up and demand a new hard drive. She will return later this week hopefully, with bandages off as well. When it rains, it does indeed pour.

So I trust Christmas went on for everyone without me, and I do hope it was a great holiday. Santa was very good to Doodle, and like a child he has chewed through just about every toy he received at this point. He especially liked the chicken and rice Christmas cookies my sister made for him in the shape of Christmas trees. He thinks everyday should be like Christmas at this point, normal dog food does not compare.

I spoke to most of you during Christmas, but I want to say a special thank you to GOD in California, who only knows me from this blog, and was worried when it went suddenly silent. I do appreciate your concern, and thank you for it. You've got an extraordinary heart, don't let anyone tell you any different (even those voices in your head ...LOL. :)